1 Timothy 3:4-5 He must manage his own family well and see that his children obey him, and he must do so in a manner worthy of full respect. (If anyone does not know how to manage his own family, how can he take care of God’s church?)

We would probably have a rather different world if this had been followed down through the centuries! Two things are true here. One is that every individual is responsible for their own actions, and the other is that Paul never had any household, much less children, to deal with personally. That said, What Paul said is also extremely valid. Not every father is wise in raising his own children, and it is a very valid question how an unwise father could be a wise pastor. We see examples of both extremes all around us. Some PKs (Preacher’s Kids) are upright believers, and some are real problems, or even actually criminal. That’s not to say that a rebellious child disqualifies their father. Franklin Graham, though now a worthy successor to his father Billy, had a time of wanting little if anything to do with the Church. At the same time, a father who doesn’t lay a foundation of faith in his children can hardly be expected to do a good job of laying such a foundation in church members, who aren’t so closely tied to him. Yes, it requires the wisdom and guidance of God, but a man who isn’t humble and perceptive enough to seek that guidance for raising his own children isn’t going to seek or accept it in relation to a congregation.

As a PK, and even MK (Missionary Kid) myself, this is extremely close to home. I didn’t always “walk the straight and narrow” myself, but I certainly knew what it was, and I had every reason to admire and respect my father and want to emulate him. My own children are a case in point. The one who went through the strongest period of rebellion is now the one who is most active in ministry. I have pastor friends who have every reason to be comforted and encouraged by how their children have turned out, and I have pastor friends whose children cannot accurately be called Christians – and of course friends who are all over the area between those extremes. My heart aches for some of them, but they are not directly in my area of responsibility. I can and do seek to teach Biblical parenting, but that can be very counter-cultural at this point! I am to operate in grace and love, both as a father and as a pastor, knowing that agape love isn’t indulgent, but it is forgiving. And that certainly applies to my congregation as well!

Father, thank You for this reminder. Thank You for how You are continuing to grow this church, if not in numbers, certainly in being Your children. May we continue to grow as You desire and intend, to present an accurate picture of Your love to the people around us, drawing them too into repentance and faith, for their salvation and Your glory. Thank You. Praise God!