Malachi 4:5-6 “See, I will send you the prophet Elijah before that great and dreadful day of the LORD comes. He will turn the hearts of the fathers to their children, and the hearts of the children to their fathers; or else I will come and strike the land with a curse.”

We often read Luke 1:17, where Gabriel references this passage in talking to Zechariah about the birth of his son John, in the period leading up to Christmas, but Gabriel doesn’t mention the last part of this, where God speaks of a curse if the hearts of the fathers aren’t turned to their children, and vice versa. Most Christians are familiar with the fact that Jesus said specifically that John was the fulfillment of this prophecy, (Matthew 11:13-14) but they don’t necessarily think about the consequences of generational alienation. The message that John preached – Repent, for the kingdom of heaven is near (Matthew 3:2) – is still being preached, but there are many who refuse to accept it. Generational alienation is happening today to a degree that seems unprecedented, and we are certainly suffering the consequences. Many cities, and even far less urban areas, are terrorized by fatherless youths who have essentially no hope of a productive future. That is tragic! The answer, just as John preached, is repentance. Not only do fathers need to repent of abandoning their children, society needs to repent of attitudes and actions that have encouraged the breakdown of the family. That includes making it financially advantageous to not have a father in the home, but it also includes such seemingly innocuous things as portraying fathers as essentially useless, bumbling idiots in most popular entertainment. When people aren’t respected, they tend not to stick around! Psychologists have said that a man’s primary emotional need is to be acknowledged as competent, and society seems hell bent on destroying that in fathers.

This is a soap box I jump up on at the slightest provocation! I was personally blessed with a Godly father who did his best, though that was imperfect as we all are. However, as a pastor and counselor I am constantly dealing with people who are deeply wounded by generational alienation. This isn’t limited to absentee fathers, but they are in the vast majority. I am privileged to counsel couples before their weddings, and I do my best to impress on them the importance of this issue. Many have not had a good example of parenting in their own childhood, so they need all the help they can get! Issues of discipline and affection, of simply being present, cannot be covered fully in the brief time I have with them, but I can at least help them understand that it is an issue, so that hopefully they will pay attention and do their honest best. I believe God will honor that.

Father, thank You for the father I had in growing up, and for the privilege of being father to my daughters. Thank You also for the privilege of helping others understand this issue, so that more and more may indeed repent and change, for their blessing and Your glory. Thank You. Praise God!