Hebrews 12:7 Endure hardship as discipline; God is treating you as sons. For what son is not disciplined by his father?

The saddest thing about this verse is that today, all too many children are never disciplined by their fathers, either because their fathers are simply absent, or because their fathers have swallowed some perverted psychology that says it’s “damaging” to children to punish them. I could easily go off on quite a rant on this subject! The devil hates families, and fatherhood in particular, because they are an expression of God as our Father, just as this verse says. Fathers who are physically or emotionally absent from their children have fallen for a huge trap, and those who are petty tyrants toward their children have fallen for one that is hardly any smaller. Fathers are called to love their children enough to take the time, and the physical and emotional energy, to discipline them correctly. Proverbs clearly says that includes physical punishment, even though that is anathema in many circles today. The fact is, rational argument doesn’t penetrate, because their thought processes aren’t that developed. Lectures don’t work! That’s not to condone abuse, or capricious punishment. We are called to do everything in love, loving God first and then loving those around us. Fathers who fail to discipline their children have at best failed to understand how to love them.

This is an area in which my parents could have done better, though I understand their reasons for what they did. I think I perhaps needed a bit more of the rod than I got! However, they did give a superb example of being committed to God, and that compensated to some degree. I know of other missionary children who were over disciplined, and that certainly didn’t produce good results! The question for me now is how I am to act as a grandfather, particularly when I am so far physically from my grandchildren. Of more immediate concern is how I am to relate to my spiritual children, with whom I interact on a frequent basis. Physical punishment isn’t an option there – God is the only one qualified in that area. However, I am both to encourage and admonish, speaking as firmly as necessary but always speaking in love. I need to be especially careful not to dump on behavior that is not sinful, even if performance isn’t up to the level I would desire. I’ve had some real failures doing that. Rather, I need to focus on praising progress, encouraging and strengthening, and offering only as much advice as they are ready to receive. I need to remember that my way isn’t necessarily the best way, much less the only way.

Father, this is a vitally important issue, as You know better than I do. Likewise, You know my failures in this area even better than I do. Help me be the father You want me to be, to my physical children and grandchildren and to my spiritual ones as well, so that I may be Your agent for Your will to be done in their lives, for their blessing and Your glory. Thank You. Praise God!